Open It
by UnionJack-O-Lantern
Summary: Lilli is home alone when Gilbert shows up on her doorstep with a few surprises - including a plan to claim her in the name of Prussia! What happens when Vash comes home to find ore-sama swooning his little sister? T for language, suggestion and...Gilbert!


Sweep sweep sweep, brush brush, sweep sweep. _Hmm, I wonder when Vash will be back._ Lilli pondered while sweeping the floor of the quaint little home.

One bright spring Saturday, Liechtenstein had woken early and decided that her brother and her's house could do with a little spring cleaning and a man surely wouldn't get around to it. She concluded that she was it's only hope against the teenage messiness of them living there, so she pushed Switzerland out to go buy groceries while she scoured away. She'd worked away all morning and was getting a little tired, but it needed to be done and boy, was their little cottage styled home looking better with just a little elbow grease.

It was 11:00 am and the only room left to sweep of the downstairs (there's another floor still to be done?) was the little entrance hall to the front door. Lily sighed and started there, promising herself that she'd take a well deserved break after she finished.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Lilli looked up in surprise at the frosted glass window pane in the door and made out the form. _Oh, who's this? It's not Elizaveta because it seems to be a man, he looks bigger than Mr. Austria and...is that something sitting on his shoulder? It looks like a round puff ball - oh! It moved! _Lilli leaned the broom against the wall and fixed her hair, tucking stray pieces of the just-above-the-shoulder pale blond hair behind her ear, then went to answer the door.

"Oh! Um, guten tag, sir!" Liechtenstein became flustered at the sight of the handsome, unique looking white haired man at the door. He had burning, alluring red eyes and a coy, intoxicating grin and he war a striking blue military outfit. The puffball on his shoulder seemed to be a...baby chicken? The little yellow chick chirped at Lilli.

Lilli blushed crimson and the sight of him and bowed nervously. "I-I'm sorry, sir..., b-but my bruder is not at home at the m-moment, he w-will return shortly, though, I expect."

"Your bruder isn't home? You're here alone?" The man tried to hide his excited smile. "Er - I mean, that's fine, since I'm actually here to see you, little lady."

"Oh! Um..." Her stomach knotted into a nervous ball. She had no clue who this man was and...was he being overly polite or was it something more? Oh, but he was _so handsome_...even with those devilish eyes, could he be a bad person? "I'm sorry, sir, but I didn't catch your name...?"

"I apologize, how rude of me." He grin broadly. "I'm the frickin' Empire of Prussia - er, at least, I used to be...but now a day's you can call me Gilbert! I'm, er...a friend of Vash's." He reached out for her hand, but she was nervous to let him take it.

"E-Excuse me, but my hands must be filthy, I've been cleaning."

"You? Dirty? Pshh." He smiled, taking her hand and kissing the back of it. Lilli blushed scarlett and looked away before remembering her manners. "Oh! Um, come in, please, Herr Gilbert."

She moved out of the hallway so that he could enter and stood in the doorway of the cute livingroom. "Um, you can sit in here if you'd like."

"Danke." He grinned. He seemed to do that a lot, like he was thinking of something amusing or exciting everytime he looked at her...

Prussia eyed the broom. "Do you _work_ here?"

"Oh, no! I-I was just doing some spring cleaning to surprise bruder."

"...Bruder, right, right, he's your _brother_." Gilbert muttered under his breath as he passed her and entered the living room, sitting on the couch. "And he'll be right along, you say?" He asked.

"Yes, I-I expect."

"Then we haven't got much time to do this, have we?"

"...Pardon?" Lilli gulped. "What have 'we' got to do? And why it can't involve bruder?"

He smirked. "Don't worry, chicky, it's nothing bad. It's a gift, actually."

_Chicky? _Thought Lilli. _Oh dear, this won't be good..._

The little bird on Prussia's shoulder hoped up and down and chirped excitedly.

"Not you!" Prussia scolded the bird. "Why would I buy _you_ a gift, really?"

The bird stopped jumping and hung it's head sadly.

"Oh, cry me a river." Prussia said to the chick. It proceeded to peck his shoulder as angrily as a chick could. He stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry at the bird. It tweeted, annoyed, then hushed up.

"Sorry about that, Lilz, he's a very temperamental bird."

"...Um, forgive me, Herr Prussia, but...how do you know my name?"

"...Er...remember, I'm a friend of you brother's! Yeah, that's it - he talks about you all the time! Saw him just the other day, he mentioned that it was your birthday today so I thought I'd get you something!"

"Oh...but he's been at home all week."

"Uh, must have been last week then! Anywho, that doesn't matter, the point is you should come sit over here with me and let me give you your present!"

"My birthday? Really?" The blonde girl paused, a little skeptical, but simply shrugged. "I must have just lost track of the days. Is it the 12th?"

"...Yes?"

Lilli tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, nervous and somewhat embarrassed. "I-I guess I forgot. That's so silly of me..."

"Well then get over here and open your gift!" He put out his hand for hers again. She took it shyly and he pulled her playfully onto the sofa beside him.

"You didn't have to get me anything, Herr Prussia, expecially since you hadn't even _met_ me before..."

"Well I've met you now! C'mon, open it, I want to see your reaction." He pulled out a small but long, thin rectangle box from his military coat pocket and placed it in her hands. She blushed at his persistent kindness and slowly removed the lid.

Inside was a simple but elegant black choker necklace with an iron cross dangling in the center. "Oh, wow...it's beautiful, Herr Gilbert, but I don't deserve such a nice gift. I'm just a little city-state Principality, I couldn't - "

"Sure you could!" He smiled, eyes wide. "Go on, I picked it out special! Designed the cross myself, see?" He pointed to an identical cross on the collar of his uniform.

"Oh." She blushed redder and redder. "Well, okay then. I do love it very much..." She lifted it out of the box and fiddled to undo the clasp.

"Here, I'll help you put it on!" His handsome face shone with delight. She blushed even deeper as he turned her around on the couch and attached it around her neck. She turned back to him shyly.

"It is very, _very_ nice, Herr Prussia, thank you."

Prussia was exstatic. He could have jumped out of his skin with joy. _YES! She excepted it! Ha ha ha! She excepted the iron cross!_

"That's the first part of your present!" He beamed, revealing a much larger, blue box with the Prussian seal stamped on the cover from his coat (what kind of pockets does he have in that thing?). "Here's the other half!"

"No, I couldn't, Herr Prussia. You have already given me too much!" Lilli insisted.

"...You know, you can call me Gilbert, right?"

"...Er, _Gilbert_, then, but please - I couldn't possibly - "

"Sure you could!" He shoved the large box into her lap, a little over eager, grin beaming. _All it took was a Cheshire cat grin and a little bit of flirting and this chick was putty in his hands. Ha! _Gilbert sneered internally._ Just wait till big brother comes home to find out that his precious little sister has willingly signed herself over to -_

"Lilli?" Vash's voice sounded from the entrance hall. "Lilli, I'm back - Are you talking to someone? Do we have company?"

"Oh, um, yes, we do!" She called to him, ignoring the box in her lap, to the silverette's annoyance. "We're in the living room, your, um, charming friend Gilbert is visiting for my birthday..."

"GILBERT?" The blond boy cursed under his breath. "Lilli, get out of there now and don't let him touch you -" Switzerland warned, the sound of his boots pounding the floor as he ran to the room-

"Lilli - " Gilbert grabbed her hand and squeezed it. "You need to open the mystery box now - "

"But I -"

"Just open it already!-"

"Er, we might as well just wait for Vash-"

"Do it NOW, chicky!"

"LILLI, NOOOOOOO!" Vash stood in the doorway, pieces of his sunny hair fallen in his face, his and that attractive face smeared with a horrified look.

"NOW!" Gilbert squeezed harder.

Lilli tore off the lid of the box...but she didn't get a chance to look inside.

She was blinded into the dark and Vash practically jumped on her on the couch, covering her eyes with a hand. She felt the open mystery box fall from her lap, spilling onto the floor and revealing its contents.

"God, man! WHY THE HELL ARE YOU GIVING _THAT_ TO MY SISTER?" Vash yelled.

Gilbert was tear deep in laughter. "It's her uniform! It's what she's got to wear everyday while serving at my house!"

"What do you mean uniform? Firstly - that's hardly enough fabric to be called clothing! And secondly - SERVING AT YOU HOUSE? What the hell did you do to my little sister?"

"Don't blame me - she could have refused!" He was almost crying in laughter. "Look around her neck, Swissy! It's the iron cross! I offered it to her and she excepted it, which means she now belongs to Prussia!"

"WHAT? S-She's your property now?"

"Yup! And I can make her do whatever I want - including make her _wear_ whatever I want!" She couldn't see it, but Lilli knew Prussia was grinning.

"You...bastard!" Vash growled.

"...Um, bruder?" Lilli pulled at his hands over her eyes. "Could you...?"

"No, it's too disgusting, Lilli! It'll burn your little virgin eyes!"

"..._My_ virgin eyes? Then how can you..." Lilli gasped. "Bruder, you've entertained a woman before? You never told me!"

"What? No, Lilli, why would you ask something like that? - "

Gilbert laughed (if possible without exploding) harder. "Dude, you've never gotten laid?"

"What - er, yeah, 'course I have - "

"So you have? Then who was it?" Lilli clawed.

"No, Lilli - "

"Oh my God, how old are you, man? Jesus, that's pathetic!"

"You can't call me pathetic - you tricked my 15 year old sister into your house - "

"Oh, was it Hungary? It was Lizzie, wasn't it, and now you're not a vir - "

"Chicky, there's no well in _hell_ he screwed Hungary. She's a viper with a frying pan- "

"Everybody, just SHUT UP!"

You could have heard a pin drop.

Vash breathed heavily with anger and frustration. "Gilbert, I will shoot you in the fucking head and splatter your brains across the wall unless you give up ownership of Liechtenstein."

"Ha! D'you think I'm afraid of a tiny neutral country like you? I'm the gott damn Empire of Prussia, for hell's sake." He stood off the couch, towering mightily over both of the others. "Now, _I_'m asking _you_ - kindly step away from my territory and we'll be all hunky dory. We'll just be on way back home, isn't that right Frauline?"

"Vash, I'm scared." Lilli clung to her brother's hand on her eyes.

"Aww, don't be, Liebchen." Gilbert leaned down and tapped the end of Lilli's nose with his finger. "I'll just grab the mystery box and we can leave hand in hand - "

"Don't you dare lay a finger on Liechtenstein." Lilli felt her brother tence up around her.

"Man, you are just a constant pain, aren't you?" Prussia cracked his knuckles. "Let's see if I can shut you up for a second."

Before Switzerland could pull his gun (meaning faster than it takes to blink), Prussia had smacked him square in the face with the most powerful punch Lilli had ever seen - and she did see it; Vash fell backwards and hit the floor hard, letting go of her and restoring her vision. She saw him gushing blood behind her, swearing under his breath and covering his nose his his hands.

"C'mon, Lilz, we've gotta go now!" Her attention flew to Gilbert. He slid the now-closed-and-contents-replaced box in his coat again and grabbed her hand. He tried pulling her out of the living room to the front door but she fought back. Lilli wasn't very strong, but even a little struggle would make it more difficult.

"No, Herr Prussia, I-I can't go with you! You hurt bruder, I've got to take care of him - "

"He'll be fine, now let's go! You can open the mystery box at your new home, hmm? Hmmmm?"

Of course, Lilli had lost any previous affection and admiration for the man the second his fist made contact with her bruder dearest. "I really DON'T CARE about the stupid box! Expecially if it holds some sort of god awful outfit-!"

Gilbert moaned. "So persistant." He yanked her closer and grabbed behind her knees, swinging her feet out from under her and flipping her over his shoulder like a damsel in distress - which I guess you could say she was, except for the action wasn't part of _saving_ her from said distress.

"B-Bruder!" Lilli cried, but her brother was already on top of it.

BAM!

Smoking colt 38 still in hand, nose still bleeding, Vash was stanced on the floor pointing his weapon directly at Prussia's lower back - so that he wouldn't hit Lilli. We're glad he's got good aim.

"Damnit, kid!" Gilbert seethed and weakened, dropping Lilli to her feet just before falling over. He leaned on the wall and slid down, streaking blood down the wallpaper. Yet...he still smirked. "That tickled." He looked up a Lilli, scared stiff where he set her down. "Okay, Lilz, give me just a minute, _then_ we'll leave."

"Y-You, you..." Vash quivered with fury. "YOU $!&*^$#^^%!$% SON OF A ^$$&^%$!$%$$#%%#$%%#*(*&^# PERVERTED !*&^#!#$*&^#%&$^&^#!$^&*&^%$#!#^&*(*^%$#! DISGUSTING *&*^$^*(*%$##^&^%$^*&$^$%$ REPUBLICAN^$*$*$^&%^*#*^% $&*$($^#$$(%*$%#$ #*#%#%^$*$#%#% ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER (*&#^*(*&%$$$^&*&#$%^&*&$%^&^$#$% AND A BOWL OF MUSHROOM SOUP *&^$%^&*&*^$##^&&$#!#%^&**^^#$!&& AND SHOVE IT RIGHT UP YOUR !#$*&^%$#!#$%^&*!#$%^&**&^%$#!#$%^&&*^%$#!#$%^& TYLENOL QUICK DISSOLVE !#^**^%$#!#^& GLUE **&^%$##$%^&*&^%#!#$%^& COBRA STARSHIP !%!&^%#! BURNING PILE OF #$%*&^%$#$%^&**&^%$#!#$%^&* ONEMATEPIA !#$%*&^%$#!#$% I'LL GET RUSSIA ON YOUR A- ^&*^%$#!#$%^&^%$#!#$%^& MORSE CODE *&^%!#$%^&%$#!#$%^&Q$^***^&%#!#$%^ JUST LIKE THE ENDING OF LOST SEASON 4 #$%^&*#$*&^%$#!#$%^&*&^%$##$% DISNEY WORLD #$%^&%$##$**************************************************************************************************************

*****************************************************************************************************ASSHOLE!"

"...Classy, dude." Gilbert scoffed. "Too bad you didn't cover her ears, huh? Her virgin ears, oh no!"

"Get out of our house!" Lilli muttered, glaring as evilly as she could to him on the floor, marched withing a foor of his body, then promptly kicked him in the face.

Ha ha, Prussia, ha ha.

"Bruder, would you please call someone to come collect him or something?" She turned to him, looking totally innocent and girly and Liechtenstein-y again.

He smeared the trickling blood from his nose on the green sleeve of (his own) military coat. "Right, Lilli. I know just who to call."

Lilli blushed and smiled. After some quick consideration, he smiled too.

While Vash grabbed a phone from an end table('Cell phone are expensive!') Lilli took the conveniently placed broom still leaned against the wall where she left it and began to sweep Prussia out the door (rather, poke him with the end until he was outside).

Once on the front step, he realized he wasn't on top anymore. "C'mon Lilz, we can still make a break for it! I have the mystery box!" He sang.

"No thank you." She chidded, quickly undoing the chocker necklace. "Here, have this back. Go try your luck with Seychelles or something." She threw it at him and turned back, stepping back inside the house. "Oh, and by the way, I think your chick is hungry."

"Huh?" All of a sudden, the little bird on his shoulder started nipping and pecking ferociously at his hair and ear. "Hey! Stop that, you crazy little - ow!"

Lilli shut the door and was done with him. Vash was just hanging up the phone.

"Is someone coming?"

He scoffed. "Oh yeah. _Hungary_. And she's brining the frying pan."

"Oh! Does he really deserve that much?" Lilli worried.

Vash stood and walked over to her, then pulled her in and crushed her in a hug, her arms pinned at her side under the pressure. "He almost stole you, Lilli! He tried to conquer you - and once your claimed by a more powerful country, the can do _anything they want _to you. Can you imagine what that psycho pervert probably had in mind?" Lilli shook her head in his chest. "Well, that's good, I guess, so you don't have to think about it."

"Bruder," Lilli murmured into his coat. "You'll never give up your ownership of me, right?"

He was shocked. It took him a second to chide out a carfully worded response (because he worries about everything like that, you know that). "Of course not, schwester."

"So I'll live with you forever and ever?"

"And ever and ever and ever, schwester." He still kept a straight face, y'know, incase anyone saw him _caring_.

"No matter who wants to claim me? Even if they offer to pay for me?"

"Lilli, you're mine. No one with any amount of money _will _ever or_ can_ ever take you away. I'm selfish, I want you all to myself." _There, that doesn't sound too mushy, right?_ Oh, the self consciousness of being 18.

She smiled and snuggled into his warm chest, freeing her arms and finally hugging him back. "Okay."

"Okay?" He pulled away. "Lilli, you _like_ being controlled by someone else? You don't want even the smallest bit of independance?"

She blushed. "Please, don't look at me like the girl everyone looks down on because she can't live without a boyfriend. It's not like that at all."

He stiffened. "I know that much. It's just...you don't want independence at all?"

"You act like you don't even let me out of the house. You let me be as free as I want, but I always know I have a caring home to come back to and bruder to follow. I..." She blushed deeper. "I don't think I would feel this way if it wasn't you who took me in to begin with."

"That's so...um, kind." He looked away (damn that self consciousness) but noticed the blood smear on the wall. "...Lilli, why the heck did you let Prussia into out house, anyhow?"

"Oh, um, he said he was your friend and you told him it was my birthday...he came to bring me a present."

"Lilli," He grabbed her shoulders lightly. "Just for future reference, Gilbert is not my friend. At all. In any way. Especially now. Secondly, even if they say they're a friend, if you don't know them and I'm not there, don't let them in. Some of the others think you'd be easy to capture because I'm young and they think I can't guard you, and Prussia just thinks he's Gott and controls Earth. Thirdly, why would you except a gift from a stranger? And finally..."He just sighed and shook his head. "Lilli, what do you see outside?"

"Um, slowly melting snow piles and brown grass?"

"And that's because it's currently...what month?"

"March."

"And your birthday is in...?"

She felt like smacking herself. "...July..."

* * *

**...And she never found out what was in the mystery box...****but if you want, **YOU can!****

**Read the alternate ending! Chamber Maid, it's under Prussia x Liechtenstein, Romance & Drama. It's rated M for LEMONs, people, it is more extreme than this! I****t's what might have/would have happened if Vash hadn't had made it home in time and Liechtenstein was swept off to Prussia's house. Things...happen. I'M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU LOOK LIKE A BAD PERSON, GILBERT! *dies of shame***

**Danke = thank you ~ ****Frau/Frauline = lady/woman ~ Liebchen = love, little love; not the verb 'to love', but an endearing title ~**** B****ruder = brother ~ S****chwester = sister**

**A****s some of you may have assumed, Switzerland didn't mean 'virgin eyes' as in 'virgin' - never been with someone. He meant she doesn't need to see this because she's young, we don't want to scar her and blah blah blah.**


End file.
